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Laugh Track

Mirm Hurula

I admit to using humour

to cope


But the TV doesn’t know my struggles!



I have been struggling with suicidal ideation

since I was 12

When I realized

my body and mind weren’t enough

myself wasn’t enough

I deserved the verbal assault

from people I trusted most


I deserved it

From those I went to

I deserved it

I could tell them anything

I deserved it, I deserve it, I deserve it


Wait, what are you doing?!

I don’t understand!

Why is this happening?!

Why are you helping me?!

What this feeling in my chest?!



Where are you going?

Why are you leaving? I’m sorry…

What just happened? I’m sorry…

Wait! Please wait! I’m sorry…

I don’t want to be alone!

I hate being alone!



I’ve been numb to that touch since

a touch to help me


some are warm, burning my skin

leaving permanent scars with memories.

others are cold, and they leave ice,

unbreakable ice,

but, it’s nice and cool


I build walls around it and protect it

No one stays too long…

it’s too dark…                                                             too scary…


I don’t blame them,

I wouldn’t stay either.


I’m just here to watch TV.


Mirm Hurula

Mirm Hurula

Mirm Hurulais an emerging author and poet learning to write in genres they've been interested in since they were in elementary school. Mirm was named one of the top 10 collegiate poets in 2019 and 2020, by Bass/Schuler Entertainment. They received a fellowship for Martha's Vineyard's Institute for Creative Writing's Conference in Summer 2021. They’ve had multiple publications with their university's undergraduate journal, The Catalyst. Mirm incorporates brown and queer stories into every piece to give representation they craved as a young reader. They hope that their stories can uplift and center voices that haven’t seen the mainstream.

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